Donny Osmond Wins Dancing With the Stars, Mormons Everywhere Rejoice.

by Jenny from the Blog

Let's face it. If you had to pick one douchebag to win Dancing With the Stars this season you would have had your choice of Aaron Carter or Donny Osmond, with Aaron Carter probably being the better candidate. Unfortunately, it was Donny Osmond who inexplicably douched his way to the top in last night's finale.

I guess we should simply be grateful that the whole ordeal is over with. Now we'll get a break from having to stab ourselves in the thighs with table forks because that's more enjoyable than watching D-list celebrities leap around a dance floor like a bunch of Hobbits on acid.

Taking third place in last night's competition was Kelly Osbourne, who ended up being the pleasant surprise of the season, which doesn't say much for this show. The contender to win had been pop star, Mya, who despite having bug eyes big enough to trip over, managed to make it all the way to second place. Which left Donny Osmond and all his obnoxious Mormon relatives happy at first place. This, of course, was totally fair. Never mind that Donny's dancing was mediocre at best and annoying beyond comprehension--he still managed to win Dancing With the Stars, thanks to the surplus of well adjusted voters everywhere.

Although, these are the same voters who put a clinically retarded cowboy in the White House twice, so take it all with a grain of salt, Donny.








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